Furry Writers' Guild Forum

Munchsized Fiction

I’ve been in a mood lately to write micro and flash fiction with restrictive word counts, and I kind of wanted a nice neat place to keep them all. Don’t get me wrong though, this isn’t just an excuse to post the works here. I do hope for some critique, especially since I might work on a whole string of horror-themed micro-fiction for Halloween that doesn’t fit into Voice’s Drabble challenge. So please, feel free to critique away!

With this one, I think I might change a bit of it to better echo the innocense of the girl that I saw in my mind’s eye to make the last line a bit more of a gut-puncher. This works for now though.

Possible triggers in this thread: Blood, Violence, Predator and Prey play

~~~~~*~

“New Life”

She sat on the edge of her bed, legs swinging as she hummed a soft tune. This was a new beginning, a new life. Her shoulders rolled back as her tail twitched to and fro, to and fro, keeping the rhythm of her heart. This was a new day, a new start. She stretched out her body, fur fluffing as her whiskers flared, before bare feet touched the ground This was the first step to a new journey. Sirens blared in the distance, growing closer and closer as she sloshed the blood near her feet. Here’s to a new life…

The repetition isn’t so much an issue in something this short, IMO. Umm…not much to say, but I think it does achieve the effect you were going for.

Coolies, thanks! Still want to tweak it, but glad I can keep the repetition in.

I don’t think this is quite “autumn” enough to post in Voice’s drabble challenge XD I also tried a very different technique with this. I love adding twists in micro-fiction, but I’m a little worried it’s a bit too much of a O.o moment to be enjoyable >.< Please let me know!

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“Predator and Prey”

A multitude of scents assault a black nose in the crisp morning air, yet damp fur mingled with fear are easily plucked out of the layers of pine and brush and leaf-rot. Breathing quiets, heartbeat slows, countering the rhythm that is growing faster with each passing moment. Muscles bunch as the stillness settles heavier. Any moment now… There! Muscles let loose like so many springs, throwing the predator out of the brush. Soft flesh gives way under sharp claws and gnashing teeth as a scream echoes out. Food is scarce this time of year. Good thing the prey is well-armed.

Mreh, this was from a writing prompt, so probably not fully appropriate for this thread. It’s short though, and I like how it came out, so shrugs For the first ten minutes, I had to write based off of the word given to me. For the second ten minutes, I had to choose four words from what I had just written and include those in the next part. I have no idea if I’ll ever be able to use this, but it was a fun exercise if nothing else. I might attempt the same word with a completely different feel for the piece later on. We’ll see.

The word given to me was Silver.

For the second part, I chose the words Red, Peace, Shattered, and Quiet just to see what I’d come up with. I spent a bit more time on this piece since I had an actual ending point I wanted to get to X3 Oddly enough, I find myself somewhat fascinated with the tod, though he seems like a rather cliched character.

331 words for the first part.
469 words for the second part.
800 words for both pieces, total.

~~~~~*~

Erish groaned as she stirred awake. She took her time, acknowledging one sense at a time to keep from overwhelming herself. She smacked her lips together, noting a nasty taste in her mouth that was probably left over from the chemicals in her drink. Her teeth ached as if she had been chewing on tinsil; the stress must have followed her into her sleep, causing her to grind them again. A simple fur blanket was covering her naked form, though rich silken sheets had her legs tangled up. The scent of earth and freshly cut wood coated the air, with a lingering smell of smoke and a fire. Her muscles ached and her ears felt like they were stuffed with cotton. She flicked her tail once, twice, free of whatever had been inhibiting them earlier. The feline finally opened her eyes to the pale silver light of the foreign moon that broke through the cracks of the curtains. A small smile tugged on one corner of her muzzle as her shattered mind finally seemed to draw a few pieces together. She was in a new world, in a new life. Here, she could finally find her second chance, and maybe a bit of peace, and that all-illusive forgiveness she had longed for for so long. Her body arched as she stretched in full, causing her cream fur to fluff as she yawned. She untangled her legs and slipped out of bed. Her bare paws were silent on the woooden boards as she padded to the window. The velvet darkness of the curtains was left undisturbed as emerald eyes peered through the crack. The world was covered in a quiet blanket of pure white snow, a frozen desert that most would deem cruel and unforgiving. For Erish though, it was as if the world was agreeing that a fresh and pure start was exactly what she needed. Perhaps she could keep it pure this time, instead of staining it red once more.


The tod adjusted himself on the branch he had been crouched in, stretching one aching leg and then the other. The quiet of the night seemed to sink into his very bones, making his joints stiff and his muscles sore, yet he refused to give up on his mission. His patience paid off as a pair of cold green eyes came into view. Memories of what the owner of those eyes had done to him played through his mind, fueling the hate that was needed to form the spell. He shifted his grip on the branch, and bit back a small yelp as a splinter drew a few drops of blood from between the pads of his finger. A small growl lingered in the back of his throat as he flicked the droplets away, and he turned his focus back on the spell. He felt the old familiar hatred build back up as he remembered the feeling of the metal collar being snapped around his neck. The fingers of his free hand tingled with the spell as he recalled the way his own body betrayed him. His lips drew back in a snarl as he could practically taste his own sister’s blood, drawn by his own claws, all thanks to the command given to him by that wretched monster. Long had he saught vengence, and finally, at long last, he was going to be able to fulfill it. The spell had built up in his hand as a ball of light. The eyes had vanished from the window, but it didn’t matter. He knew where she was now. He pushed the spell forward as hard as he could and held his breath, waiting for the sound of shattered glass. It never came though. Quiet curses spilled from his lips as he realized there must have been a barrier protecting the cabin. He had underestimated the monster.

A chill ran down his spine when he realized the barrier wasn’t the standard one so many often used. His head whipped around just in time for the mirror-image barrier to loose his spell right between his eyes. His body seized and his lips drew back in a silent scream as the ground flew up at him. His body landed with little more than a small puff of snow. The spell released the pain, leaving his body paralyzed as it ate away at flesh and muscle and bone and bone with very little prejudice. No one would ever know he had been here. No one would ever know what he was trying to accomplish. No one would ever know the monster that feline had really been, until it’s too late. Maybe though, just maybe, he could finally find peace.

Minutes later, and nothing was left of the would-be assassin except a few stains of red.

Sorry to disappoint, but the figures you gave are the character counts. The word counts I’m getting from an online utility are 331 and 469 respectively for the two parts.

Ack, thank you! No dissappointment involved. I thought those looked wrong, but I was using wordcounter.net and was in a hurry, so didn’t double check x.x Fixing now.

I understand why you’re emphasizing new, but I might try other ways to intensify the same sense of wonder, latent magic and sexual intensity, etc.

She sat on the edge of the bed, legs swinging to the tune she couldn’t quit humming. Her tail kept time as well as she stretched and writhed, joints popping in atavistic glee. Nearly free now! Fur fluffed, whiskers flared, then once again bare feet touched the reeking bloodstained floor. Time now for a new journey, a new experience, new hopes and dreams.

Sirens sounded in the distance. Time now to run!

If you find a market for these ultrashorts let me know. I have a backlog with no place to put the,